and now that you don’t have to be perfect, you can be good.

this is the 100th post on verbs and vignettes! it’s taken a little while, because i’m working on not setting too many deadlines for myself and only doing things because i really enjoy doing them.

i woke up this morning with a suntan on my shoulders, my hair smelling like that great mix of hair gel and pool. i went swimming last night like i haven’t done in ten years. melissa came over with two sets of goggles, and it made all the difference in the world – bobbing around and getting bored in 5 minutes, to swimming around like a fish. i can’t believe i forgot how much fun i used to have. i was in the pool for 6 hours every day down the shore when i was little. and i think it’s just as fun now. she showed me how to do a real swimming stroke, and i showed her how to do tumbles. then i got cocky and did 5 in a row, and remembered all too well how many nights i went to bed with waterlogged ears.

LIFE UPDATES after the last 100 posts
* i was a little hormonally unbalanced for a few months, and while i’m not completely even yet, i am on my way.
* EP and i are going strong, 15 months in. :-) i tend to be slightly bad at relationships, but he does a good job of pulling me back when i’m overreacting or over-analyzing or feeling a little crazy.
* i’m struggling with healthy eating. it’s never an easy game for me, but it’s been a particularly trying 2012 so far. i love eating good, healthy foods that are good to my body, but i also have a history of binge eating, and just unhealthy foods/quantities in general. i’m trying. i’m trying. and that’s all any of us can do. but i’m feeling frustrated, and trying hard to not feel defeated.
* the plan:

1.) wake up and go for a little walk. it wouldn’t be a lot of exercise, but it would be a really positive, refreshing way to start the day.
2.) journal. it’s is as good for me as it was for 14-year-old me. really cheap therapy that helps stop my mind from spinning and sometimes helps me get to the real problem when i can’t find it on my own.
3.) make a forgiving meal plan that is easier to follow. i either have no idea what i’m eating day-to-day, or create a plan so structured, there’s no room for anything that might come up. i’m going to be all about the middle ground.
4.) experiment with sugar-free and vegan for a few days. i don’t plan on adopting either of these plans, but i think giving them a go (sugar-free for the second time – i did it for about 3 weeks last year!) could make me more mindful. i have been having waaaaay too many sugary treats throughout the day, basically every day. and i am really passionate about cheese + ice cream + etc. i’d like to just remember to start appreciating + enjoying them more.

* i want to keep trying to manage my free time. i don’t think i have to be a perfectionist about it. i can be casual but still mindful. when i’ve zoned out and am relaxing, i’m not even enjoying it. and i hate the feeling of losing hours.
* i just joined goodreads, after hearing a few people talking about their recent books. it’s a really well-designed site, and i like that it can point me to new favorites + help me organize all of my “to-read”s.
* i want to start working on my 101 list. i’ve been updating + revising off and on, but i haven’t really worked on any that take thought or effort so far. i did get a massage in mexico, and i plan to try for watching the sunrise on the beach later this month when i stay with my parents at the shore. but i want to start picking off some that i think i could do sooner and later.

so that’s that. lots of rambling about what i’ve been thinking about most recently.

it’s been a pretty fun 100 posts so far. ::cheers:: to the next 100.

Comments

  1. says

    Happy 100th girl :) Congratulations to you & the boy for still going strong! Isn’t it amazing when you find that guy who loves you for you even when you feel as if your @ your worst from time to time? You acknowledging that you still have some ways to go when it comes to your eating, just shows how strong you are as woman girl. You’ll get through it, I promise. I keep a journal of what I eat daily, and I plan my meals for the following day. It may not be ideal for others but it works for me.

    Have a wonderful rest of the day!

    • says

      thanks, jessie!! it still blows my mind how giddy I still get about him. I’ve never been sooo happy with someone.

      and yeah, I WILL get through it. :-) I’ve been much better about keeping my food journal this week. even if I’m still struggling, it’s really helpful to see what’s going on day-to-day.

      • says

        I feel the exact same way about the hubs. I can’t believe that after 8+ years I still get those childish “butterflies” everytime were together :).

        Way to be positive girl! Glad the food journal has been such a big help for you. It works wonders for me.

  2. says

    This week has been a struggle with food as well. When company comes all bets are off, back on track today. I am going to look into that book site, I need some new ideas for my 11 year old.

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